Copywriter: Sam Podolsky
Begin Again
Engagement and marriage mark a new beginning in people’s lives. So does divorce, which around 50% of marriages end in. And what better way to celebrate the bitter end of a bad relationship than with something that actually lasts forever — diamonds from Kay Jewelers.
As soon as a married door closes, a bedazzled door opens. Kay will launch pop-ups outside divorce courts offering ring trade-ins when you present your divorce papers at checkout.
Out with the garden variety self-care gift baskets with tea and bath bombs, in with the total reinvention of your style. Kay will offer bouquets of other divorcees’ repurposed rings, bracelets, necklaces, and earrings at highly-discounted rates, so you can spoil yourself with the gems you never had when you were with them.
Kay will partner with 4-time divorcee Martin Scorsese to “direct” a social series in which one half of a former celebrity couple gets a divorce party.
The newly-single celeb will read vows to themselves, give themselves a new ring, and party with people who hopefully love them for real, all orchestrated by the master (and extremely divorced) showman.
Stardew Valley has wedding rings and marital bliss, but divorcees have nothing to show for it besides 50,000 less gold in their pocket. Kay will partner with the devs to add a small patch that still leaves you broke after your virtual divorce, but this time with a ring in your inventory.
Hot off the heels of a divorce is the perfect time for a palette-cleansing trip to start your new beginning. Kay and Airbnb will team up to give rental discounts to divorcees for the first six months after the papers clear. The catch? The farther away from your ex, the bigger the discount.